Be Still

I heard a sermon over a week ago that caused me to face the stark level of anxiety in my soul. WordNet.com defines anxiety as "a vague unpleasant emotion that is experienced in anticipation of some (usually ill-defined) misfortune." When I looked deep inside, deeper than my normal deep, I recognized worry, nervousness, and that "vague unpleasant emotion" that fights fear.

As I thought about it all, the still small voice spoke, "Be still..."

I'm not exactly a fast mover these days, but I pick my nails. Almost constantly. Frayed nails expose my anxiety. Just last Sunday, someone commented on the less than desirable state of my ring and pinkie fingers, especially. I smiled. I used to cover them with acrylic nails, but eventually gave up on the beauty routine and prayed for peace. A peace that would show on my nails.

I looked up the Hebrew definition of "still" from Psalm 46. I read, "abate, cease, consume, fail, faint, forsake, idle, leave, let alone..." At the end of the long list of words, small letters referred me to a related definition a few numbers back. There I read, "cure, heal, repair, thoroughly, make whole."

I expected the first list of words, but not the second. They still resonate deep. In stillness there is healing. In letting alone a cure. In ceasing I can be made whole.

Two months of summer lie ahead. I hope within a few weeks to post a photo of healthier nails as I soak in the Psalmist's words, "'Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.'" (Ps. 46: 10)